Writing the Letter
I've decided that this whole incident in my relationship with my father has inspired me to finally tell him all the things that I've been holding up inside for my entire life, and I'll write him a letter detailing everything. All my issues with him, all of my disappointments, all of my gripes, all of my regrets. I have been holding back and protecting him for all of my life from the harder elements of my own life. Bad things have happened to me, but I wanted to save his feelings and his world. You know what -- screw that. He should have been protecting me, and he failed. So I am going to tell him how he failed. I don't care if he hears me or not -- it will feel good to finally get it out. I just hope he reads the letter, instead of throwing it out.
You go, honey. Right on. It is definitely time to get some of that shit out of your head and into the cleansing light of day.
And don't worry, the last thing your dad would do is actually *throw out* the letter, being pretty much incapable of throwing anything away as he is. It'll probably just get buried in a pile of other paper and then eventually get shoved into a bigger pile and then maybe, in a few years, get swept up into a box by somebody who's actually taken pity on him and tried to declutter and create some sort of order amidst the chaos. Not sure who that somebody will be yet, though. ;)
Nice one, Julie.